The ever-lively responses and eye rolls of Norma while she and her granddaughter banter.
The unrepressed joy of Gramsie when her son-in-law arrives at her home, with his overnight bag, for a sleepover.
Grandpa Van Hoy makes sure his granddaughter has water before bed and shows her how he used to make her bed when she was little, using her grandmother’s favorite doll, after she accepts his invitation for an overnight visit because he was feeling lonely.
These beautiful interactions highlight the value of love in action between generations.
Let’s explore four evidence-based reasons why cross-generational connections are worth our time and effort—not just as individuals, but as a society.
Social Value
Research shows that meaningful connections between generations strengthen social networks and build community resilience. Communities with strong intergenerational ties tend to have better social support systems and higher levels of civic engagement—in other words, greater social value.
Generations United “I Need You, You Need Me: The Young, The Old, and What We Can Achieve Together” report graphic.
Generations United organization, in collaboration with The Eisner Foundation, published "I Need You, You Need Me: The Young, The Old, and What We Can Achieve Together" that highlights the current situation, the wants, the needs, and the solutions for more intergenerational interactions. The report is summarized in a useful social value infographic.
Knowledge Transfer
Stereotypical assumptions are that older generations tend to share historical perspective, life experiences, and traditional skills while younger ones teach technology navigation and contemporary social perspectives, but that is a far too limited perspective.
Generations share knowledge about everything from knitting to kayaking—sometimes unidirectional, but most of the time, it’s a back-and-forth exchange of skills, information, and mindsets. My mother used to keep my grandsons informed about the latest clothing and hair styles when they were young.
Regardless of the subject, learning enhances cognitive function, empathy, and social skills for everyone—those teaching and those learning.
Mental Health
Meaningful human connections benefit mental wellness, with additional benefits across generations. Relationships between older and younger adults tend to reduce depression and isolation for older adults and increase self-esteem and emotional regulation for younger people. Both age groups benefit from decreased anxiety and improved mood.
Age Prejudice
Ageism and negative stereotypes (as well as other prejudices) are reduced when people of different social or cultural groups—including age-based ones—interact in meaningful ways. “The Contact Hypothesis was first proposed by Gordon W. Allport in 1954 and has since been supported by numerous studies in the field of social psychology,” (Simple Psychology).
Recent research suggests that simply spending time together, without specific conditions, is beneficial (Allport originally identified four necessary criteria in his research). Regular exposure to people of different generations leads to more positive attitudes and fewer discriminatory behaviors—in other words, it promotes social value.
Connecting Intergenerationally
We know it builds social value, so what are some practical ways we can do this as Social Seahorses?
When physical distance is an issue, engaging in pebbling lets people know you are thinking of them. Pebbling is the art of giving small, seemingly meaningless items or gifts as a way of showing love to people you want to stay connected with. Most often, pebbling is done digitally such as sending memes, video shorts, and images from your daily life.
Non-digital pebbling could involve swinging by to drop off a single flower, a cup of their favorite coffee, or a cool heart-shaped rock you found while hiking that reminded you of them.
Discover the art of just hanging out together with no structure or agenda by liming. You simply exist and be…together.
Plan a sleepover with a friend or family member from another generation. Include special snacks! I recently discovered a new candy that is delightful. I shared a bag with my son and son-in-law to introduce them to it so we could marvel together about how good it is. Sharing likes and dislikes about food is a low-level risk way to bond with others.
If you know someone who isn’t getting out much—whether due to physical or mental limitations—ask if they’d like to accompany you on an everyday task, like grocery shopping or getting their car’s oil changed.
Impact
While these kinds of connections create bonds that benefit us personally, an additional outcome is a better society. Creating a kinder, gentler nation isn’t something our government can mandate (though, they can support it with programs and initiatives); it’s an identity. It’s something we embody—it’s being, together.
Ask yourself, what does a more caring world look like?
Some of the characteristics of a kind world include:
- Speaking to one another in respectful tones
- Showing empathy to one another
- Looking out for each other
- Accomplishing projects together
To have those characteristics develop, we first have to interact with one another, and that’s what being a Social Seahorse is all about—interacting with one another with respect, kindness, empathy, protection, and action.
Make the world a better place this week by intentionally reaching out to someone.
Golden Connection Challenge:
Make a cross-generational connection with someone.
Share this blog with others to increase social value in the new year.
I’d love to hear about your experiences with a comment here or email me using the contact form.
You can find cross-generational inspiration from the social media channels of the people whose shorts I shared in the opening of this blog. (Note, you can find most of them on multiple platforms; my first choice is always to share the YouTube channel if they have one I can find.)
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