Connection provides freedom for neurodivergent man

 Poet, activist, scholar, optimist, and documentary film maker DJ Savarese (DJ) lives life connected.

I first encountered DJ as a keynote speaker at my company’s annual Accessibility Institute. His statement, “It’s not being independent that gave me freedom, but connection,” still carries the power of a locomotive when I read it.

Freedom comes through connection

DJ is a nonspeaking autistic artist and activist who found freedom in connection – connecting to his family, his schoolmates, and his caregivers in tenacious ways that opened doors for him that many neurodivergent people only dream about. Now he works to open doors for others.

Just one of his projects is Listen2Us, an Open Society Foundation where “DJ Savarese shares tools to promote self-determined, inclusive lives for nonspeaking autistics and community workshops designed to shift public misconceptions about nonspeaking people.”

As someone who grew up surrounded by those with chronic illnesses – Multiple Sclerosis, Huntington’s Disease, and mental illness – I witnessed a lot of energy focused on how to be independent. I now recognize that it’s not being independent that provides us as humans with the freedoms we crave but being connected.

Expand your possibilities

So, how can we connect when we see our possibilities limited?

Maybe you feel constrained because you’re an introvert.

Maybe it’s because you have physical limitations.

Or, maybe it’s because you struggle with anxiety and depression.

As a nonspeaking autistic, one might not recognize the possibility of diving into the verbal arts, yet DJ writes some of the most beautiful poetry I’ve ever encountered.

In his keynote, DJ encouraged us to challenge the limiting beliefs about ourselves we've collected throughout life that can narrow our possibilities.

While launching two online businesses simultaneously, I’m daily encountering tasks that at times become overwhelming for me; I reflect often on what DJ taught me about the need to be aware of and access our possibilities – adding to and emboldening them.

Expand the possibilities of others

Another thing I learned from DJ is that we can make the worlds of online work and education just a little better for ourselves when connecting with our neurodivergent friends, colleagues, and learners by being aware of not just their needs but their possibilities.

Up to that point, I had focused my concerns with accessibility as an inclusion need – how can I make sure those with ADHD can focus as best as possible in the meetings I facilitate? How can I ensure that those struggling with anxiety have a voice in meetings? How do I accommodate hearing, vision, and mobility challenges?

Thanks to DJ and others I encountered, I now think along the lines of seeking out the unique contributions that others possess that benefit the community when I connect with them – whether that be in the office, the classroom, or life communities.

And, once identified, what is the best way to highlight and engender those benefits? How do I bring out the hyper-focus gifts some ADHD people bring to a challenge? How do I call out for others the thoughtful analysis an introvert often brings to a subject?

How relying on others lifts everyone

DJ mustered all his bravery reserves to attend college, being graduated from Oberlin College in 2017 with a double major in Anthropology and Creative Writing. It required a lot of trust and reliance on others to accomplish his goals.

He co-produced the movie Deej: Inclusion shouldn’t be a lottery which invites you along on a six-year journey of pursuing a college education as a nonspeaking autistic student.

The movie is a powerful demonstration of how to engage with others from a perspective of their possibilities and accomplishments rather than dwelling on limits and barriers. It is a winner of a 2018 Peabody Award and nominee for a 2018 Emmy Award.

Seeking Connection

I‘m so grateful DJ taught me the solution to obtaining freedom is building connections.

I started this blog with the limiting belief that I didn’t need anyone else to accomplish its creation . After all, it’s just writing a blog a week (for now); I could do it all independently.

I quickly learned that not only did I need tech help – and a lot of it (!) – I needed other human beings to provide me with feedback and ideas. I needed people who would challenge my pre-conceived ideas, plans, and direction so that those ideas could be honed and formed to develop into a blog with a clear purpose and value.

I still have a long way to go, but doing so together – in connection with others - rather than alone has given me the freedom to get this far.

See the Golden Connection Challenge for ways you can build freedom through connection and share your own suggestions below!